My Mental Scars
Entries of Past

Misery - 01 February 2006

Renaissance - 22 October 2005

Turmoil - 28 August 2005

20th Birthday - 24 August 2005

My Soul? - 23 August 2005





Hole. . .
2:17 p.m. on Sunday, Jan. 20, 2002


Blackness. A dark hole. Depression and anger seeping from the dank compacted walls of your torture. Deafness surrounds all. You can only hear the raspy breathing of your own lungs. Your eyes search, and nothing is revealed. Your bleakened soul thrives in writhing agony, awaiting it's time. It's demise, anything. Anything but this prolonged nightmare. Day after day. Night after night, but you can't even tell the difference. Countless hours you spend in anguished misery. Never leaving your bounding cage, never seeing or feeling the warmth of the sun baking on your light skin, or the soft breeze sweep through your billowing hair. Your eyes closed to the smell of the fresh Earth and to the blossoming of the fragrant lilies. The harmonic tunes of the bird's immortal songs resounding in your head. All escape your mind in an instant. That is not where you are. You're in hell. Never to be rendered the same patience that once was bestowed upon you long ago. You will never have the sweet peace you could have once denied. Now there is nothing. Not even a weapon or tool in which to dispose of yourself with. An eternity of this. Nothing left, no end.
This is your eternal resting place. . .


Farewell