One never knows what they truly have until it exceeds their grasp forever. I once had, what I considered, an everlasting bond of friendship and compassion. The end never did quite rupture my illusory realm of fantasies, and still it lurks in the empty shadows of my heart. An unwillingness to admit I threw something profoundly priceless away will always irk me; haunt my every presiding memory of her. We titled ourselves Joker Buddies. Never seen without the other, my kid sister, of now 15, and I proved completely inseparable.
Perhaps an instantaneous connection, Amy served as my most valuable treasure, and always managed to ensnare the closest position to my soul. Countless years passed entangled in endless mischief, a decade of one, no one meant anything but her. Friends never compared to the sort of companionship I felt in her midst. They belonged to other people, not me, for I possessed the most meaningful of all: my younger sister. She kept me running, even when events seemed irreparable; her bright caring smile shed light on the battlefield of emotions, symbolical of my face. We lived practically in eternal trouble, but she always chose to spare me, and stole the blame for herself. If someone told me I must forfeit my life for her, second thoughts would never even come to existence. Though distanced now by innumerable differences, she continues to hold that fraction of me that once would spoil her to such a degree that angered our parents. Unfortunately, however, times change, and so do people.
I began to emerge from my shell some years ago. The simple acquirement of friends seems not so far fetched as normal. It appeared as though my younger half began to disintegrate from my eyes. Our ways parted silently, but for the infrequent skirmishes of maturing. She presented her fists as weapons in such squabbles, whereas my words would sting her tender eyes with tears of loathing and anguish. Nothing could ever emulate what once had flourished between us. Too many changes gorged the link that once bound and we will never view one another with the same innocence of unconditional love again.
However we may alter, I know we will continue to remain close. Periodically we sit together, alone, and reminisce about events that occurred long ago in the forgotten forays of time, but seemingly mere moments in the vast capacities of our hearts. I had the world in the form of a beautifully gifted, passionate child. For once it did not elude my reach, but I let the remnants drift away. I cast the pieces somberly down intricately woven cascades of loving memories, never to see recapturing again. That, perhaps, proved the largest mistake of my life: by letting the relationship of Amy and I vanish so willingly.
